Monday, July 26, 2010

Attachment...


Once we take form in our mother’s womb, the Attachment started. It is our first as we are attach to Mum by umbilical cord. We felt what Mum’s feel…hot, cold, hunger, happiness and sadness. It is important that Mum keep a balance mood, eat properly and have to be very careful as we are very fragile.

When we come into this World, the connection with Mum via the umbilical cord is served. This Attachment continues and it is even more intense. We need Mum and we are attached to Mum via her breast for milk, her loving care for warm and her attention to make sure we are well. Dad comes into the picture and he started rocking us, changed our diapers, together with Mum he bathe us…and additional Attachment. Now we have our own bed, bolster, pillow, milk bottle, pacifier, bowl, plates, tumblers..OURS…OURS…OURS. If we lost any of those, we will throw a tantrum.

As we grew, we are jealous when the family has additional member i.e brother and sisters. This is because of Attachment and siblings competition start. All these are because we need our parents’ attention. As we grew older, we start to have things we called our Own. Some, we willingly share, some we cannot share. The reason for not able to share is due to Attachment, because it is mine and why must I share. This so call MINE, change our relationship with our parents, siblings, friends, husbands, wives and people around us. Because of ATTACHMENT, we are short fused. You are stepping on my toes, you are crossing over to my turf, you are taking away what is MINE, we become emotional, we felt anger, we are confused and we get mad at everything and anything.

I believe you never think that the simple word – ATTACHMENT can give rise to both happiness and sadness. We are attached to a person, he became YOUR husband/wife. It is Attachment that what is YOURS cannot betray you, cannot do things that are not to your favor, or make you angry. If this Attachment changed, you become hysterical, you harm yourself or to the extend you take your own life.

You are so much in love, but love changes once you are married. It does not mean that the other party don’t love you anymore but because love have gone one level up – it is responsibilities and giving you a good and safe home. There are people who wants to hang on the love and complain about every little thing and like to compare with other couples around. Each Karma is not the same. DO not embarrasse your husbands/wives by talking bad about them, after all you pick them. There are also siblings who fight for parents, properties. Money is more important than blood. They forget they cannot bring money to the grave and what is the harm of sharing? It is because of all these Attachment that we are not aware of, we let it ruined our lives. There are people who are detached. Not that they do not have feelings but they know that things changes.

In this World, look around you, everything is Attachment. Can you give away, yes, only things that you don’t want. Will you give someone something that you felt you will have to spend money on it? Yes and No, it depends on that person standing with you. You will never give stranger anything worthy, even worst when it comes to money.

Recently I read in the newspaper about a maid who inherited S$6 millions from her employers, not including all his properties in areas like Orchard Road. I rejoice at the merit of this maid. She has taken good care of her employer and his mother and they have left her all their savings. You will wonder that the maid struck a pot of gold. NO, she have put in hard work and sincerely looked after her employers. Nothing comes free. It takes a big heart to give and it takes even a bigger heart to receive because if one becomes attached to what is given, it is no more a joy but a burden.

I always remember I will die one day. I know that I cannot take all these with me. I need to give it away and yet I find it difficult to let go. I am trying and learning. I do not want to accumulate any more things. We buy things not that we need it, we simply collect and yet we find it so difficult to give it to charity. There are people who said …”this is my hard earn money, why should I give it to Charity?” The finer picture means we are attached to things we call our own.

The day that we will have no choice but to let go of Attachment is the day we die.

Wise saying…”You come with nothing, You go with nothing”.

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